The meat and guts of translation, testicle boxing and fake geisha. I lost count of the number of companies I worked for in Osaka. What with short business English contracts, intensive courses, steady part time hours and the never ending part-time work search, trying to neatly construct a liveable income together like fucking employment Tetris, … More Cake and Blowjobs – 500 Yen. Enemas – Free.
Can I get that in an XL? No, not the size. I mean the “FUCK.” Clothes shopping, it’s always an experience. The bizarre English language adorned garments you find on sale or just being worn around town in blissful ignorance; at first is a total ‘double take, what the fuck is that all about’ moment … More Bitch Slag Fuck Potato T-shirts
I’m not a backpacker anymore. I’ve got a suitcase……with wheels bitch! For some inexplicable reason, Japan always captivates the average ‘Gaijin’ (foreigner) traveller with the obligatory modern vs. ancient culture, hectic vs. tranquil, wacky vs. serious and inherent politeness of the populous, to name but a few. I’m not saying it isn’t there, as it … More Japan. Me and it.
Continue to the end, there’s literally a ton of porn My penultimate job was working part time in a university conversation lounge for 2 years, where I had several ‘debates’ with faculty members regarding the decline in popularity of our walk-in English practice room, which ended in the usual ‘talking to a brick wall’ conclusion. … More Murdering the paper boy is not an option then?
When in Roman House, don’t do as the Romans do The highlights of quite possibly the worst apartment building in Osaka. Roman House – a tinderbox of a dwelling. Possibly pre-war, unfortunately not levelled by carpet bombing, constructed from timber beams, straw tatami mat and various unstable building materials responsible for 2 of the 3 … More Cat sniping, chain smoking and silent sex
NOVA (Nonsensically Organised Vacuous Asylum) Everone’s favourite first Japanese job. Unless you have a real skill or some seriously shit hot Japanese ability there isn’t much of a choice on the employment front. My initial job was working for NOVA, the largest high street ‘Eikaiwa’ (English conversation) school in the country sporting near on 1000 … More Can’t spell student without stud. This place is full of ’em.
Can’t you just watch TV? The word maniac or ‘mani-aku’ doesn’t necessarily portray those of unsound mind or murderous intent. The Japanese definition of this imported word leans more towards describing those with an acceptably high enthusiasm for a pastime, even if it seems borderline unhealthy infatuation. There are indeed those that put a lot … More You do what now?
King For a Day I was considering putting this experience in the ‘C is for Common Sense’ section, but I’m worried I’ll grow old before that section even nears completion, so I’ll give this little gem it’s own spot. Obviously living abroad for so long you tend to receive birthday and Christmas presents, care packages … More Post (lobotomy) Office
I recommend personal training, i.e. by yourself. So continuing with ‘when old people do stupid shit and nobody helps’….(review Ambulance/Accidents) I’ve been going to the gym pretty much my whole life. On a positive note, Japan has an excellent system of cheap city council run sports centres. My local cost a mere 1500 Yen for … More Gym rats, and other worse creatures.
Right hand shopping basket, left foot old man’s face. Whilst out riding I rounded a corner to find 2 pensioners on the floor trapped under their bikes. From the bottom up it was like a grandma, bike, parasol, shopping basket, grocery, old geezer bike lasagne. The entangled old man couldn’t get up as he was … More Cyclageddon
Land of the Aggravating Sun 